How to improve as a man – Accepting an unpleasant reality

Society has come a long way in terms of equality. It is true that at many points in the past there was gross inequality in nearly all aspects of life. Are things perfect? No, are they better? Yes. As a man you have a very unpleasant reality staring you in the face. At one time men enjoyed the fruits if in-equality. Maybe you were alive for that, so you think it doesn’t apply and that’s largely true but society has evolved to the point where it is now common place to shame/cancel people for things that happened decades prior.

That’s an unpleasant reality for everyone. What is the unpleasant reality for men that we have to accept? That Women, Pets, and Kids are loved unconditionally, and a man is loved only when he provides something. Of course this isn’t an absolute, it’s not 100% of the time but you look at the current cultural and social norms and this is a truism. Is it right, wrong? I’m not here to debate that or get into an argument over men’s rights or feminism. I am here to help men improve and for today’s lesson on improvement, men have to accept this reality.

There are organizations all over the world that help women, children, pets. When was the last time you saw an organization that was dedicated to helping men exclusively? I’m betting it’s not often at all, and are you a white heterosexual male? LOL good luck…

Don’t fight battles you know going in you can’t win.

How we improve here is by accepting this social dynamic reality. Fighting against it is wasted energy at this point you will be overcome by wave after wave of individuals whom want you silenced. I’m not here to discuss their motivations or why we are where we are but to offer you a way to excel in this reality. Embrace the notion that your value will be based on what you can provide to others. It is not and never will be unconditional like women, pets and children. As a man you will be measured by what you offer, for now anyway.

If you can accept that, then you can begin the process of building the basis by which what you are offering is in demand. That is the secret here, understanding the social dynamic and creating the conditions by which you “fill the bill”. Maybe you want to fight against this and find it hypocritical and detrimental? I would recommend you research MGTOW if that is the case. If you want to prosper as a man in the 2020’s what you offer to others will dramatically increase your value.

Examples of “offerings”

  1. Financial stability
  2. Good moral compass
  3. Physically fit
  4. Great hygiene
  5. Leadership
  6. Willingness to do the work others wont
  7. Honesty

I am not suggesting this is a great situation at all, its problematic for everyone because in the end what happens is resentment. Resentment is the poison that kills relationships. You’re going to resent people because you have to deal with this reality. Meantime something happens to a female and there are 800 different resources for them to draw from to recover. You? You’re on your own. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you will become stronger and have more to offer.

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Oscar Wilde

Trusting Billionaires and Millionaires

I am continually baffled by the ever growing cult of personality we see in modern society. From politicians, to celebrities, to business moguls why is it people gravitate towards the extreme 1%? I understand there is a romantic notion out there of how cool it would be to have that kind of money etc. but have you ever taken a deep dive into how some of these people accumulated so much wealth?

We are seeing this somewhat with the Musk takeover of Twitter. As if this is some heroic attempt to further free speech on a clearly biased platform. Sure that might be a nice residual effect but you do realize that the amount of data alone he would have access too by acquiring twitter would be worth likely trillions? You think Google has a lot of tracking/resale of data? What do you think a genius entrepreneur with billions in capital is going to do with all that? Sit on it and just keep twitter open “for the good of all?”

LOL, he’s going to make it a highly profitable PRIVATE entity. That’s what Musk does, he did it with Tesla. It’s likely going to come as a surprise to a lot of you but Musk didn’t start Tesla. He did what he is doing at Twitter, he made a huge investment into the company to become a large shareholder and then changed the corporation into what it is today, nearly 2 decades later. Look I’m not saying he is a villain here but be careful whom you place on a pedestal.

Hero, Visionary, Villain ?

Same for politicians. I remember millions of people online and elsewhere shouting something like “Trump is an idiot” ya he’s so stupid he made millions in NYC real-estate, then made more millions on a successful TV show, then the buffoon was so dumb he became president of the united states. What a moron…. Look at your state senator, let me guess a multi-millionaire right? What a shocker.

Point here is folks the 1% the ultra-rich are cunning, intelligent and extremely savvy. Sure some of them are lucky but many of them play the cult of personality game very well. They are nuanced in their approaches to business, public perception etc. Yes, many of them had a leg up when they started, like Trumpy (he got money from his dad) but he took it to another level. Be careful how much power and adulation you give these individuals.

The Zuckerberg’s, the Musk’s, the Clinton’s, Trumps. They are the equivalent of your ancestor’s aristocrats. Believe me if their hold on capital, information and power is threatened (which you saw in 2020) they will do everything and anything to hold on to power. They will cancel you, lock you down, create obstacles for you to vote on and on and on. It’s about economic class, not race, not gender, not political affiliation.

The haves want to keep us at each other’s throats. If we are fighting each other over ridiculous “ists”, who is watching them?

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Should you trust the “media”?

This subject comes up a lot and the conversation inevitably boils down to your political ideology. Basically “media” now is there to either affirm your positions, or confirm your opposition to others. Look I am going to make this quick as the answer to “should you trust the media” is very simple. The answer is no you should not. Why? Let’s be blunt here.

The “media” is comprised of multimillion dollar personalities who derive wealth and power from those who click on their content and consume their narrative. They are basically entertainers in the traditional sense. Media used to be comprised of journalists who were working class. They lived in normal neighborhoods, their kids went to public schools, they were local people.

Trust the Media? LOL

Now? They are celebrities. Go ahead turn on FOX, CNN or any other major network and look at the people on the screen. When did you see them last at your gym? At your grocery store? At your towns local fair? Your local affiliates might be there sure but most of them are aspiring to become national brands. The media has become purveyors of entertainment to play to specific narratives to engage and ingratiate themselves to a specific group/market of people.

You absolutely shouldn’t trust them. Particularly since most (if not all of you) have this small box (a smart phone) you carry around that has access to nearly all the collective knowledge of human history. Why would you narrow your information inputs to a few multi-millionaires?

What are they saying that you need to hear? Don’t be fooled, they are entertainers. They can’t relate to you; your life is a sharp departure from theirs. It’s in the media’s interest to keep you watching and clicking that’s how they make money to pay themselves millions. Broaden your information horizon. Engage others who might have a different opinion on an issue you will be amazed at how much you have in common.

And how little you have in common with the “media”

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Enough

Never forget – Indulge my rant, I don’t do it often.

Remember this time in our collective history. Remember the pandemic and the voices who demanded cancellation, banning, demonetization. Remember the voices who demanded you be penalized for not conforming to their narrative. Remember the voices who demanded you put something into your body, whether you wanted to or not. Never forget their names, their persona’s, their social media accounts.

These are some of the most dangerous people in the world and the pandemic exposed them.

They are driven by fear, they are weak. These are the types of individuals who will use phrases like “they say” to bolster their arguments as to why you should conform to their desired outcome. You know who they are now, you have no excuses should you chose to engage with them. They were willing to penalize you to the extreme to get their way, will you forget it? Will you offer them quarter when the tide ebbs and in the future they find themselves adrift?

It’s all abstract until you are the one who runs afoul of the narrative. The nature of power is it is all consuming. Those who want it, and taste it, keep pushing for more. Soon even those who wanted you cancelled will be in the cross hairs. Will you come to their aid? Will you stand up for them? Will you recognize that what is happening to them, they themselves tried to do to you?

Plastic destroys the environment
Us vs Them = Garbage

It’s all very dark isn’t it? Its dystopian and it does not bode well for the future discourse. Everyone has a soap box now, a you tube channel, a blog, a podcast. If you were one of those who were advocating penalizing others during one of the most challenging times in our modern social history, you will find many out there who will not forget you.

You typed the words, you created the videos, you made the podcasts, you posted the tweets. You have been exposed, you gave no quarter, and you will get none.

For my frequent readers this is not one of my normal posts and I want to be clear this is not directed at anyone specific. It is more of a cautionary tale really. Consequences is no longer a popular theme in today’s social construct. It’s very rare when it happens, but when it does it can be devastating. Be careful what you say to people, how you frame it, the level of vitriol you emit. The social construct has indeed changed a lot, forgiveness, understanding and compassion are no longer the ideal.

When will the next phase of the social dynamic emerge? Will it be a revisit of our prior ideals or a new harsher one? One based on consequences? I think how we have chosen to treat one another over the last few years is going to have deep social ramifications for many years to come. I for one won’t forget all the noise, the fear mongering, the propaganda, and I won’t forget who was pontificating it. I will never listen to them again.

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Am I contagious?

A Follow up to my post – Comply or Else

So this is a bit of a side track for this blog as I don’t normally do follow ups on recent posts. The post I am following up on can be found here. I have received more feedback than anticipated via email and direct message. A quick aside, it’s interesting as a creator to see the amount of people who actually look at your material far surpasses the likes on any given post. J

Let me say first there was one hostile person out of 6 who contacted me. The majority agreed with my post but wanted to emphasize a specific point. I’m going to make some blanket statements below that are meant to address the issues that were raised to me without compromising individual’s anonymity.

To the hostile person: I will never take responsibility for another adult’s emotional response unless I am specifically trying to harm them. I don’t know you. You were not a consideration in the post I made, how could you be? Again I don’t know you. I would encourage you to eliminate those people in your life you believe to be negative influences, if that includes my blog so be it.

To my friends in Australia: I only know what I see in the news and read online. I don’t in fact know how bad it is so it wouldn’t be responsible for me to pontificate about it. I hope you take some solace in the fact that there are millions of people around the world who are compliant out of convenience not out of agreement. The fact I chose vaccination was personal but as a gesture for you I will offer a brief explanation on my reasons. I have elderly people in my life who rely on me to help them. Putting them at risk of Covid would have been irresponsible, so I got the vaccine.  I had the choice, I was not forced (unlike you) if I had been forced perhaps my decision would have been different but months later, I am no worse for the wear. Get the vaccine, but keep the fight for liberty going.

To those who saw my comments on another blog: No “Comply or Else” is not a result of that interaction. Yes, that interaction influenced the post. My blog speaks for itself, I have been pro liberty since day 1 and If I see others who are not, I will give my opinion on it. I don’t regret any language used, I do regret that I was unable to articulate the point clearly enough so others couldn’t conflate some of the terms to inflame a narrative but I cannot control how other people think. This post and its context appear regularly on this blog, liberty is paramount, IMHO. We all use terms to emphasize a point, and when people chose to fixate on one term rather than the point it was trying to emphasize it’s a waste of time trying to convince them otherwise. More often than not, their mind is made up anyway. If I point at the sky and say “it’s blue” and the rebuttal is “no it isn’t, and “it’s” not an it” spending the next hour discussing what an it is, doesn’t change the fact that the sky is blue….

Am I being hyperbolic? Well yes to a degree, I won’t deny that. Nothing is absolute and sure “Comply or else” is clickbait but I stand by my prose. I think the cavalier attitudes around others freedoms is dangerous. I think healthy debate and a good examination of the issues, including nuances should be done. The environment (particularly online) is not conducive to that end so we do the best we can. This is the strength and weakness of dwelling in an online world.

My body my choice: This is specific to one person. I have no issue with this argument but correlating it back to an abortion argument is a fool’s errand. You are attempting to remove people’s emotions and argue logical points. I don’t dispute your argument; I think you are spot on but trying to convince an irrational person with a rational idea is a waste of time. I don’t have the energy for it anymore, good luck.

Conclusion: I’m not going to carry on with this beyond this post. I will read any messages you send me and comments here but I will never compromise your anonymity. If you are one of the people who contacted me privately you fall into one of the categories above and this should address the issues beyond our personal interaction.

I believe you should get vaccinated, but I believe you should get the right to choose to have it. Just like businesses should have the right not to serve you if you aren’t or chose not to serve you if you are. I believe we have become too reliant on “authorities” to tell us how to act and how to behave. Remember “no shirt, no service”? It was clear, concise and to the point and it was an agreed upon social contract. Be careful who you empower, it’s all abstract until you are the one who disagrees

Your Pagan Friend,

Karac

Comply or else

They are coming for you. It’s not a matter of if it’s a matter of when. Your neighbors, people you trust, someone within 100 feet of you right now. Who are they? Normal everyday people. Many of them are genuinely friendly and nice but they hide a deep secret. What is it? They have rationalized a consequence for your choices based on their fears. We have seen this many times throughout history and it rarely ends well. You see the logic is unassailable “This is a dangerous act, so you should comply or else”.

What if you don’t think it’s a dangerous act? That no longer matters. You will comply or you will be cancelled, reeducated, shunned, chastised, ridiculed or worse. This is what modern western culture has come too. This mindset is prevalent everywhere, from Belgium to Australia to the U.S and everywhere in-between.

You are living in a modern “cultural revolution”. Sure that term isn’t being used at the moment but go ahead, take a look at its use in the past, I dare you. This particular “revolution” is at its peak at the moment, at least that’s my estimation, I hope I am right. You see it’s not enough to feel a certain way, but if others don’t feel the same or accommodate that feeling? BAM! People are tired of it.

The Party is over.

The historic pattern is the same. A fear proposition is offered to the masses. Empowered by numbers many begin to dehumanize you. You must offer coherent arguments to satisfy their fear, even when you explain it clearly, its not enough. They have already made up their mind, they are empowered, you are the minority. You become labeled as non compliant…. A problem. You are then categorized based on this designation, anything else you have done doesn’t matter, you are now “X”. In the past you were marked physically so you could be identified this has evolved to your electronic signature but the concept is the same. All of this leads to one horrible end, you are put in a corner. Your options become less and less, your hand is forced. “COMPLY OR ELSE

In the past if someone was fearful, they protected themselves. Now? Everyone else has to change to accommodate their fear, regardless if its rational or not. I believe many, tens of millions, have had enough of this and are finding their voice and fighting back. Be wary of those who smile at you as they talk about taking away your liberty, they are extremely dangerous and most of them don’t even understand why.

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New Variant, same packaging, more anxiety.

Covid marches on. We now have a new variant that is making the news rounds just in time for the holidays (what a coincidence). At nearly 2 years in on Covid the battle lines are pretty much drawn at this point. There isn’t a lot of wiggle room out there so keep in mind the views I give on this blog may not necessarily be mainstream. Believe it or not, I can see both sides of the issue. I know *GASP* a moderate!!!!! KILL IT WITH FIRE… but seriously….

Here we are in the middle of the holiday season and we have another variant Omicron. You will start to see this variant pop up in every news story from now until the first of the year. It will be tied into xmas, inflation, gas prices, and any number of conservatives screaming about vax mandates or liberals screaming about canceling someone they don’t like. Meanwhile out here the real world where we have to live our life it’s another layer of anxiety heaped on us.

For those of us with anxiety Covid is a bludgeon. I get it, its serious people can get really sick and some die. I’m not dismissing it. The vaccine has been available now for nearly a year so anyone who wants it has it but there is no let up. So how do we deal with YET ANOTHER wave of covid inspired anxiety? I wish I had a great answer honestly, I don’t. I think we are eroding our social construct to the point that in 5 years I’m still going to be answering people if I got the vaccine or not (which I did).

Maybe a nice cup of tea will help?

In the end you have to still work hard to create the life you want. If that means getting vaccinated for you good. If it means not getting vaccinated and subjecting yourself to restriction and hostility, power to you. In the end as people with anxiety we have to begin to accept the fact that Covid and the current variant are going to be present in our lives for the long term. I envision a future where a covid booster is going to be pressed on us annually and the covid bludgeon will be used anytime the media and or politicians need a way to get the masses riled up.

It may or may not be a big factor in your anxiety journey I don’t know. What I do know is it’s not being let go. Meaning having a vaccine available and allowing those who want it to get it isn’t enough. So we will all still be consumers of the covid story, emboldened to shout at and argue with those who don’t agree with us. A convenient label to lump anyone with a singular view into a neat bucket so you can identify them, and market to them…. I digress.

Just remember anxiety is real and the more you consume covid news the more anxiety you are going to have. Be kind to others, respect others liberty, treat people the way you want to be treated and determine what is right for you and lead by example.

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How to improve as a man – Accepting an unpleasant reality

Society has come a long way in terms of equality. It is true that at many points in the past there was gross inequality in nearly all aspects of life. Are things perfect? No, are they better? Yes. As a man you have a very unpleasant reality staring you in the face. At one time men enjoyed the fruits if in-equality. Maybe you were alive for that, so you think it doesn’t apply and that’s largely true but society has evolved to the point where it is now common place to shame/cancel people for things that happened decades prior.

That’s an unpleasant reality for everyone. What is the unpleasant reality for men that we have to accept? That Women, Pets, and Kids are loved unconditionally, and a man is loved only when he provides something. Of course this isn’t an absolute, it’s not 100% of the time but you look at the current cultural and social norms and this is a truism. Is it right, wrong? I’m not here to debate that or get into an argument over men’s rights or feminism. I am here to help men improve and for today’s lesson on improvement, men have to accept this reality.

There are organizations all over the world that help women, children, pets. When was the last time you saw an organization that was dedicated to helping men exclusively? I’m betting it’s not often at all, and are you a white heterosexual male? LOL good luck…

Don’t fight battles you know going in you can’t win.

How we improve here is by accepting this social dynamic reality. Fighting against it is wasted energy at this point you will be overcome by wave after wave of individuals whom want you silenced. I’m not here to discuss their motivations or why we are where we are but to offer you a way to excel in this reality. Embrace the notion that your value will be based on what you can provide to others. It is not and never will be unconditional like women, pets and children. As a man you will be measured by what you offer, for now anyway.

If you can accept that, then you can begin the process of building the basis by which what you are offering is in demand. That is the secret here, understanding the social dynamic and creating the conditions by which you “fill the bill”. Maybe you want to fight against this and find it hypocritical and detrimental? I would recommend you research MGTOW if that is the case. If you want to prosper as a man in the 2020’s what you offer to others will dramatically increase your value.

Examples of “offerings”

  1. Financial stability
  2. Good moral compass
  3. Physically fit
  4. Great hygiene
  5. Leadership
  6. Willingness to do the work others wont
  7. Honesty

I am not suggesting this is a great situation at all, its problematic for everyone because in the end what happens is resentment. Resentment is the poison that kills relationships. You’re going to resent people because you have to deal with this reality. Meantime something happens to a female and there are 800 different resources for them to draw from to recover. You? You’re on your own. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you will become stronger and have more to offer.

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Ancient Wisdom - Confucius

How to improve as a man – disconnect from other’s expectations

This is one of the hardest concepts to implement. It’s pretty close to “stop caring what other people think” which, unless you are a sociopath you’re not going to be able to achieve. However, other’s expectations is a broad enough category where we can whittle away at this which is the point of this post. Simply put, have good values and morals which you adhere too is paramount to self-improvement. Where you obtained those values is an aside really, the point here is trying to distance yourself from others expectations.

The perception of masculinity and men as a whole has changed dramatically over the last 50 years. It’s a mixed bag of good and bad to be blunt. For most men it’s now challenging to understand where they fit into societies expectations, as hundreds (or thousands) of years of accepted norms are no longer applicable. Disconnecting from the current status quo is paramount to your happiness as a man, and then by extension those who you have in your life.

This doesn’t mean you treat people like crap, be disrespectful, confrontational etc. It means you make the rules you live by and should people like or not like it that is there choice. The key proposition here is you are setting your own expectations and working to reach them. This in turn should attract to you people who are of a like mind. This is a net positive for you and everyone around you. This enables others in your life to clearly gauge you as an individual, and determine for themselves if you are someone they want to invest their time in.

Obtaining a thick skin is a life long journey

This also empowers you to live the life you want. One major caveat there though dear reader, when you do this you will face consequences. Society is in a place today where social dictates come from multiple sources. They are loud, aggressive and in many cases have extreme responses to anyone who does not adhere to their particular moral doctrine. That isn’t meant to scare you, just a warning. “cancel culture” is real, anyone can be targeted for mass harassment for a simple tweet like “I didn’t help them change their tire. 2 empowered females should be able to handle it no problem”

The world is full of anonymous experts in everything, particularly how you should think and feel. Be mindful of this as you venture through your own self-discovery and decide what works for you and how to implement it. Disconnecting from other’s expectations is extremely challenging, it means that some in our life will be unhappy. It may mean that on your journey you experience a lot of turmoil. Take heart, as this journey is your own and becoming a better man, at the end of the day, makes everyone around you better too.

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Enough

It’s now completely US vs THEM

Government provides and enforces rules that are ideally made to benefit the broader public. There comes a time when the implementation of those rules become punitive and penalize the very citizens it’s supposed to help. There is no shortage of examples of this in history and we are now in the middle of the current iteration. It’s very simple, Covid has become political. It’s no longer about keeping people safe, it’s an ideological fight now.

Simply put, there are vaccinations available for anyone who wants them. It’s reasonable to assume the people who wanted them got them, but it’s not enough. Now we are at the point where many feel it’s imperative to force those who don’t want it to get it or face harsh penalty. No work, no travel, fines on and on.

We have to be honest and examine why? Why are we to the point where it’s not enough for us to feel safe but we have to impose on others to do something? Fear is a great motivator, and so is trying to win and or beat down those whom you don’t agree with. It’s a dangerous slippery slope. Why? Because life is cyclical and the next iteration of this, you may be on the other side.

You better work on getting a thick skin, you’re going to need it.

All those people who were shamed, harmed, penalized for not doing what you think they should you think they are going to forget it? Do you think if they have an opportunity to do to you what you did to them they won’t take it? You’re a fool if you think there aren’t millions of people out there pissed off that government is forcing them to take the poke, and people are going after them aggressively. You’re a fool if you think they won’t remember who said what, who did what.

A vaccine is available, everyone who is eligible should get one. I am no anti vaccier, I got my shots. I don’t however try and go after people who chose not to. I respect the notion of “my body my choice” some, sadly only employ that logic when its convenient. So if you got this far in the post, thank you. One last piece of wisdom here, careful when you are active about how other people should behave. There is no hiding any more, anonymity is an illusion. The world is smaller now, you appear in more places than just your safe small town.

Someday you might be the one whom doesn’t want to comply and those whom you gave no quarter to now? They will come after you, just like you came after them.

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