Tag: Wisdom

My Blogging Reality – Part 1

Posted on by Karac Avalron


To cut to the chase this blog has to evolve to its next iteration. I am in year 5 of this endeavor and to be blunt it has not gone as well as I had hoped. Now to be clear, what that means is I set goals for myself when I started this. I think it is important to have goals when you start an endeavor; it is a framework in which to operate. Don’t read this wrong, I have had many successes with this blog but in the end my objectives aren’t being met.
So when I started, I adopted the correct approach to creating online content – I focused on a niche – Anxiety. I have anxiety it is something that I am passionate about but I dedicated the blog exclusively to it and it did well, then the pandemic hit and it did even better. However, my interests were not exclusive to Anxiety and committing to creating 3 pieces a week, I needed to post about other things.


The second iteration of the blog came about, I started to post about things that interested ME, not necessarily the reader. This often only works if you have a large core audience, essentially you are asking people to become interested in you the creator not the content exclusively. This is a big ask, UNLESS you have tens of thousands of subs, at 300-500 meh.
Now in terms of metrics I scaled with other creators. As an example, I am subbed to some bloggers who have 30K subscribers but muster maybe 200 likes a post. At 600 subscribers, I muster 5 likes a post. In comparison my audience is more engaged but it’s not just about audience engagement. There are other factors at play here, 2 specifically.


FIRST: Are people actually reading the posts? SECOND: Do have the ability to continue to create at the pace I am. In both cases, the answer declined over time. Each year has seen less people actually reading this blog and me running out of things to post about. I mean 3 posts a week, how many times can I talk about my workouts or anxiety without this becoming a vlog?


So here we are in year 5 of the blog. The goal for the end of year 5 was a few thousand subs (I was hoping for 2500). A steady readership of 10% – 25% per post ( % of subscribers) and more interaction to inspire more posting. Its did not happen. This is not a plea or a criticism of those subscribed, it is a reality check. So now I find myself nearing the end of the 5 year plan. Had I achieved the goals I set out I was going to create a website and do much more branding and employ outside help to propel the blog further.


It appears that isn’t going to happen, so I am in the process of reimagining what I want to do here. That is the current journey of this blog and where I am at. May is a month where I will be traveling a lot, and it will bleed into June. The posts will likely be sporadic but by the end of June, the next iteration of the blog will be in place, whatever that is.


For those of you who read regularly I truly thank you. I will post another update soon.

Gandalf

The Wisdom of Tolkien…Again..

Posted on by Karac Avalron

“Wise men speak only of what they know”
― J.R.R. Tolkien

We’ve all heard some iteration of this in some form in our travels. My father used to say to me many years ago “When you are up to your nose in poop, done open your mouth”. Of course he was more colorful in his prose. He was a Korean War vet and didn’t have much use for B.S. I guess he had seen enough over there to understand the value of his time.

I digress though….

So have you been in a conversation with someone or a group of people and there is that one person who refers to “they” or uses the term “they say”? These are the types of people Tolkien is talking about here. As an example, if we were to talk about personal finance I could hold my own with just about anyone that’s my area of expertise.

Hobbit Hole
So does this mean I can be a Hobbit?
“They Say” this house is to small…

If for example we were talking about Astrology I wouldn’t know the first thing other than some cursory info on the solar system, or a guess at how many stars are out there… you get the drift.

Be mindful in your life who is speaking to what subject. It is true the older you get the more experiences you have and you can speak wisely on many topics. Another example… I can tell you and speak to how to jump start a car. Not because I am an auto mechanic but because I’ve had to do it several times in my life.

Not every wise person comes in the guise of the highly educated. A master’s degree is not required in all subjects to have wisdom in said subject. That said be wary of those who boast, who preface remarks, who use citations that don’t make sense, who refer to things that, in your heart you know just don’t make sense.

Tolkien is telling you wise men (and women) speak only what they know. Who are you getting your information from? Is this person a walking encyclopedia? Chances are they are wise in nothing at all, other than how to create the illusion of wisdom.

Interested in more wisdom from Tolkien? Check out my post here

Wisdom from the past, and present…

Posted on by Karac Avalron

“Don’t live the same year 75 times and call it a life.”
― Robin S. Sharma

Robin Sharma is an author who deals primarily in business leadership. His resume of companies he has worked with is not only notable but extensive. He is not a main stream name, many people have no idea who he is and honestly would never need to read his material. Like all good authors he, from time to time gives us a pearl of a quote. Let’s discuss it a little bit.

The quote itself is pretty obvious, how do we parlay this wisdom into the present? We are coming off lockdowns and travel restrictions and the narrative is “let’s get back to normal”. Do you want to go back to the routines you maintained prior to covid? Do you want to live the same year again?

Perhaps for you this is the time to continue the disruption of covid in a positive way. Perhaps changing your “normal” is a good thing. I’ve lived the same year multiple times, it’s easy because routine breeds comfort and comfort swallows time. Think of ways you can change your old normal. Travel more? Get a pet? Volunteer? ?

It’s a great time to change your personal narrative and not fall back into the old normal you used to partake in. Before you know it you will be 75, take me for example… I am closer to 75 now than I am 25. Don’t live the same year over again. Try something new, force yourself, who knows it might be the thing that at 75 you look back on and smile.

Thank you for coming by and supporting my blog I really appreciate it. Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

Wisdom from a 50 year old (Me) – Coworkers are not your friend

Posted on by Karac Avalron

Normally on Wednesdays, I do an anxiety piece but today I am going to give you some wisdom and a short story to back it up. The wisdom? You’re Co-Workers are not your friends. Now you probably knew that but it’s a broad statement that encompasses everything. You see any piece of information you give to a coworker can be told to someone else and potentially used against you.

Now maybe you know the people you work with well, maybe you are friends. What about the people they have on the periphery of their lives? So here is the story, I will try to keep it brief. I worked with a woman who was about my age at the time (early 40’s), I will call her Kathy. Kathy is a normal woman, of note here Kathy was Hispanic (2nd generation Mexican immigrant) now that is an important factor later on.

So we were in a common break room. People came in and out of there all the time to heat up lunch, get a coffee, kill 10 min…. you know the deal. So Kathy is explain to me and another coworker and issue she was having with her youngest son whom we will call Tommy. Tommy got in to trouble at school and according to Kathy when her husband got home he “got his belt and wiped his ass” (literally her words). I did not say much, my old man did that to me once or twice. I had earned it and he was old school, but I do not recall enjoying it.

Someone in the break room over heard the conversation and said “your husband actually whipped your child?” To which Kathy replied “Yes, but it is part of our culture we are Mexican and that is how the men discipline the boys”. Now I am listening to this and to be blunt not taking it very seriously. I honestly didn’t care, I do not inject myself into other people’s lives. Still Kathy was telling us a PERSONAL situation; we were coworkers, not her friend. The other person I was with didn’t say much they were just kind of there.

Surviving 2020 & covid
I just wanted a cup of coffee

The person who butted into the conversation? She worked in HR and her reply was “Well this isn’t Mexico, this is the United States and I am obligated to tell Child Services that I am aware of a child being abused”. I perked up quickly, so did the other silent participant in this now escalating tale of woe. So Kathy’s face turned to anger very quickly and she said “what happens in my home is none of your business.” Which I agree with, but the response from the person butting in, HR woman is what stuck with me and hence the premise of this blog post.

“What happens in your home is your business, until you decide to bring it into the work place and share it with your coworkers”

HR woman looks at me and the other silent participant and my heart sank because I knew I was now going to be inserted into this drama. It had it all, females who disagree, ethnicity references, child abuse allegations, and HR. I think I aged 5 years on the spot. So we disperse, HR woman storms off and Kathy calls her a bitch, to us, not to her and we go back to work. 3 hours later, I am called into HR. They ask me point blank did Kathy say her husband beat their child. I replied factually that no, Kathy said he “whipped his ass” and I provided the context that I assumed she meant he spanked the kid.

I couldn’t lie, I mean I could have but the HR lady knew I heard it, the other silent observer heard it and I didn’t know what he was going to say and I have a policy of not lying unless it’s absolutely necessary. That is all they wanted from me, I saw the silent observer the next morning and he confirmed they talked to him as well. Kathy wasn’t in that day, she was on a “leave of absence” which turned into a termination.

Now what I heard through the grapevine was HR in fact called child services and Kathy and family got a visit. It was determined there was no abuse etc. but Kathy exploded. She threatened lawsuits, called the owner called people every name in the book. She emailed myself and silent observer multiple times asking what we said, it was dramatic but short. I never found out the end of the story, but Kathy was let go. I assume she found another job and her life went on. The HR woman, I believe is still at that company, actually running the dept now.

So the point of all this is, even casual friendly conversations with coworkers are minefields. You can’t trust anyone at work. Do not share your personal details with people at work, and this is especially true now with social media. Someone can take what you say literally and it can get messy very quickly.

Thank you for coming by and supporting my blog I really appreciate it. Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

Finance Tip – 3 quick ways to get more money

Posted on by Karac Avalron

Below are 3 things you can do right now to get more money. These will not be side hustles, or huge amounts of money but they will save you money over time and thus increase your income and allow you to become more financially solvent. As a reminder any finance advice you see on this blog is my opinion only, based on my decades of experience in the finance industry. Before making any financial decision always obtain as much information as you possibly can.

  1. Consumption apps: What does this mean? Simple example the Starbucks app. If you consume coffee, food, gas and you frequent a particular place regularly you should see if that place has an app that offers discounts. So many of them do now, drug stores, grocery stores, fast food, sit down restaurants you name it. What many of them do is offer you discounts based on your purchases. If you are going anyway why not? Do not go out of your way to buy more, just keep your consumption at its normal level and take advantage of their promotions and you will over time save money.
  2. Health plan reimbursements: Many health plans have an annual reimbursement for gym memberships, and working out. If as an example you walk regularly, you can have your doctor sign a letter stating you do so and submit it to your health plan. Many health plans give a % back to you of your cost (gym membership, shoes) or have a flat reimbursement annually $100-$1000 if you prove you were exercising preventatively. This can mean basketball league, after work softball, a gym membership, a martial arts class, yoga instruction. Even several state sponsored and federally sponsored health insurance plans have this kind of reimbursement.
  3. Sell stuff you aren’t using: Old golf clubs, Clothes, kids toys, pets supplies as examples. There is an entire economy out there on EBay and craigslist (and others) of people buying and selling used items. It’s not hard to set up an eBay account and sell things, with the internet you can get a good idea of the value of items as well. It maybe that you have an old leather jacket in your closet you haven’t worn in years and don’t plan to. What if that sold for $75 on EBay?

Bonus Tip!

Look through your stuff and see if you can identify hidden gems. Have an old comic book collection? An antique watch? A vase from your great grandmother? Some of these items may be worth a lot of money. Ever see a show called the Antiques roadshow? Most of those people have no idea what they have, and who knows, maybe that random painting you have in storage is worth something….

Thank you for coming by and supporting my blog I really appreciate it. Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

Anxiety 101 – Working on Discipline

Posted on by Karac Avalron

If you have anxiety, depending on the day everything can slip. A bad day can set you back a week, a bad week a month and so on. Everyone has different triggers and this post isn’t meant to shame anyone. What it is intended to do is to give you 4 things you should be doing every day, even in the throes of a serious bout of anxiety. These are not fixes, but what they do is they create consistent actions and routines that will allow you to anchor yourself on the days (weeks or months) where you have crippling anxiety. Every other day these will be natural events, the list is not complicated or exhausted but they are MUST DO’S

The Mouth Routine: No this is not perverted… Twice a day, when you wake, and before you have to sleep you should be cleaning your mouth. The health benefits are for another post but how it makes you FEEL is what is important here. A clean fresh mouth is well, refreshing. What should you do for a “Mouth Routine?”

Brush

Floss

Mouthwash

Tongue comb or rake – You can brush your tongue as well, trust me on this one.

Vitamin D: I take a lot of Vitamin D. I’ve read a lot online about the importance of this vitamin and this post is not intended to be a science piece I did a post here many moons ago click it for an elaboration. If you are uncomfortable with Vitamin D fine, take a multivitamin. This should be done at the same time every day. I take mine at noon.

Consistent Sleep schedule: This is easier than it looks. I am not saying you have to sleep for 8 hours, I know most people can’t, particularly with anxiety. What I am saying, and you should be doing is going to bed and rising the same time every day. Sleep is how your body repairs. It’s critical for all aspects of your health and you need to create a consistent schedule for it. Mine?

Weekdays – Sunday thru Thursday: I am in bed screens off by 10:30PM. Even if I cannot fall asleep, I lay there. I get up between 4:30AM and 7:00AM depending on what days I go to the gym.

Weekends – Friday thru Saturday: I am in bed screens off by 1AM. I get up between 7AM and 9AM. I game, watch movies/shows used to go out will again after covid. Friday night and Saturday night I stay up but rarely past 1, and often in bed by midnight.

Human Contact: You need to talk to someone, touch someone, and have human contact (non sexually is the context here, but sex is fine but another post all together). Anxiety can be isolating and even if it is just some emails or a text you have to talk to someone every day. This may sound silly, but believe it or not there are many of us who can go weeks and not talk to anyone at all. You need human interaction, you need to “feel” and “sense” other people.

Ugh, Lists

Every day do these things. Do not wait, don’t make excuses start working on them. These will help you and give you confidence and self-worth. Anxiety can be crippling, isolating, desperate. Fight back with simple tools. Even if you only do one of the items above it will have a dramatic impact on you for the positive.

Thank you for coming by and supporting my blog! Please remember to like, subscribe and share I truly appreciate it! Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

How to be a better man: Mornings

Posted on by Karac Avalron

So in this series I post advice for heterosexual men because that is what I know. If this advice can help you that’s great. I don’t personally care about your gender, your sexuality how you identify etc. I try to provide good advice for men because honestly there is very little of it out there. So that out of the way, being a better man encompasses many areas. One of the hardest things to master is discipline.

Being disciplined helps you attain goals. It keeps you focused and allows you to measure progress. It’s a worthy endeavor and one you should be working toward and applying in as many facets of your life as you can. Today I am talking about Mornings. Now many will simply call this the “Morning Routine”. Fine call it whatever you want, but it is a means to creating discipline.

You adhere to the same processes over time and produce a desired result. We all have to wake up, so that is step one obviously. Key here is the time you wake up, it should be the same every day if possible. Of course, there will always be exceptions; a late night merits a late sleep by 98% of the time you should be waking up at the same time every morning. This establishes a good sleep pattern as well as the ability to consistently project the day as you know with a good degree of certainty when you should be getting up.

Don’t be a fool, focus on yourself first and positive things happen to everyone around you.

The first hour is key, now this can vary from person to person. Meaning you might take longer or shorter to get going but getting up in the morning and affording yourself an hour is reasonable. In that hour you should be able to achieve the following goals:

  1. Shower
  2. Face care routine (shave, trim, moisturize)
  3. Misc. grooming (trim nose & ear hair)
  4. Mouth routine (brush, floss, mouth wash)
  5. Get the clothes ready for the day – a bit more on this. Many of us put our clothes out for the next day at night, if you did great. In this space you want to get your outfits ready. Work, exercise, evening wear. This saves time and B.S. later.
  6. Food – Some of us fast. For those who don’t this is your time or make your coffee.
  7. Check online items – your social media, email etc.

Of course, this list can be added to or reduced depending on your personal situation. The key here is creating a morning routine. This leads to discipline and discipline is a core tenant to being a successful man. Many of these might be self-evident, I know it is a simple basic list but it’s the consistency over time that will help you establish more routines in other aspects of your life. Routines and discipline leads to predictable outcomes, predictable outcomes leads to success.

Thank you for coming by and supporting the blog I really appreciate it. Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

Wisdom from the past – Psalm 34:18

Posted on by Karac Avalron

The book of psalms is a wealth of wisdom. For my regular readers you know I am not a Christian, I am a pagan heathen. That doesn’t mean that religious texts and doctrine are without merit. How did Bob Dylan put it? “We always did feel the same we just saw it from a different point of view”. We aren’t here for Dylan’s wisdom, we are here for the psalm.

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”

For those of you in faith you already have a close relationship with god. For those of us who are spiritual and or unsure? This is of great comfort. Grief will happen to you in your life, and it’s a very lonely place to be. It’s worse than anxiety really because of the profound sense of loss. Take heart, if you can, maybe the lord is with you right now, even if you don’t believe.

Thank you for coming by and supporting my blog I really appreciate it. Want to see another post like this one? Click here.

Ancient Wisdom - Confucius

Ancient Wisdom – Confucius

Posted on by Karac Avalron

Many of us have heard of Confucius, we know that he was a Chinese philosopher who through his years of writing, observation and work in government created a philosophy of personal morality. This isn’t a political piece or a religious piece. As individuals with anxiety we can use wisdom of the past to help us in the present.

“The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones.”
—Confucius

How many times have we been faced with an issue that looks like a mountain? We get overwhelmed and we fall into the pit of woe that is anxiety and mental health issues. Is one little saying going to help us? Maybe a little, maybe not at all.

How to move mountains
When you have Anxiety, Mountains appear often.

That said at the end of the day events happen to us, mountains appear. We have to deal with them. The beauty of this wisdom is it illustrates literally and figuratively how to deal with a problem that becomes a mountain.

You have to start, and you work the problem one small step (stone) at a time. Look we all have obstacles that pop up in our lives and some of them are extreme. You can move that mountain, be calm, and be methodical… Take one step at a time, one stone at a time and in no time the mountain will be moved and you will be right back on your chosen path.

Thank you so much for coming by and supporting my blog! Want to see more posts like this one? Click here.

Wisdom from the past: Winston Churchill

Posted on by Karac Avalron

Nearly everyone who is reading this has either heard of or has studied Winston Churchill. To say he was (or Is) one of the most famous statesmen of the “World War” period wouldn’t be a stretch. He was in the middle of the most perilous time in modern history. The World Wars were the most devastating events in human history, oh and wedged in between those was this other event called the “great depression”. Needless to say if you lived through that period of world history you are probably wiser than most of us.

Churchill didn’t suffer fools, he did though accept the fact that even people he disagreed with had the right to be disagreeable. He valued free speech and basked in the fight and nuances of debate and semantics. The wisdom?

“Some peoples Idea of free speech is that they are free to say what they like, but if anyone says anything back, it’s an outrage.”

Boy is that true in 2021 isn’t it? Been on twitter lately? LOL. The point here is, most people that are telling you what they think often aren’t interested in hearing what you think if it’s not agreeing with their point of view. We are now to the point of intolerance where people are canceled for having “wrong think” or “wrong speak” and inconveniently we don’t have Trump around anymore to blame for it.

No its now (and always was) emboldened people who believe what they think is right and will go to extremes to make sure there is no dissent. Churchill faced this as well in his time, they were called Nazi’s and they burned books (think they would have liked Dr Zeus?) and committed horrific crimes.

Be wary of people who want to silence others, who deem something distasteful and are willing to remove access without consent. These are very dangerous people, in essence they want to control what you see, what you hear, and what you think. They are everywhere and, as Churchill warns, if you disagree it’s an outrage. Except now, the outrage has blossomed into something far more sinister.

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